Oh, the Places We'll Go...

Hello, Darling...

Did you hear that? I purred :))

I am a very content kitty right now.

I am in my grooooooooooovvvve....

I have been rolling in the grass under a clear blue sky, seeing my dreams in big giant clouds above.

They are so real.

I'm just purrrring.

And I made the very best list in my life right now.



I sorted my 100+ things to do in 2013+ into categories, and had a banging job of organizing it, making it more real and tangible, seeing how it was actually going to fit into my life, not just be some abstract list in a really cool planner :)

I sorted my future experiences into 3 lists - 1-shot things, new habits, and big plans. Of course, the 1-shot things was the shortest list! LOL

Then, I went through my lists and decided what I wanted to do before we hit the road (green, as in go!) and what we wanted to do on the road (yellow, way more mellow).

And then I decided what I wanted to do with my Tribefolk on the road (asterisks), and what was a personal journey.

I am here to share my list of things I want to do with you.

It's a bucket list of sorts.

Maybe you have a specialty, and you can enable me ;)

Pick what calls to you and hold it deeply + dearly in your heart for when I come to visit, and we will do it together, just like soul sisters ♥

Are you ready to tingle together again?

Let's...

• go to an animal-friendly circus
• visit an intentional community
• ride a horse
• go to an unschooling conference
• attend a hoop jam
• get mehndi
• go to a Rocky Horror Picture Show
• go on a date with a kind man
• learn how to felt
• sail to an island
• make a mosaic
• sing for an audience
• go whale watching
• swim naked under a full moon
• hoop
• drum
• knit
• leave a ♥ + beauty trail
• write poetry
• paint a mural
• go on a retreat
• have an intention party
• alphabet cities (eat a Taco in Tucson, etc.)
• experience my gypsy tribe
• weekly gatherings
• travel bucket list stuff, to be accumulated per research :)

I am also really wanting some more deep experiences with sisters ...

• create a festival
• collaborate on a product
• host a retreat
• run an art camp
• form a band

Eep!! Doesn't that sound like fun?!!!

I am practically hyperventilating :))

In the meantime, I have lots of deep work, planning, and business growth to do *big cheesy excited smile*

I went from purring to jumping up and down in my seat, both in real life and hypothetically.

I just love life. It so rocks.

Speaking of loving something that rocks, I don't know if you have visited the blog site recently (some of you use e-mail or reader to keep connected), but I have been making some fun changes recently.

I just felt simple, and professional, and simply artful.

Let me know how you think I did :))

Still more stuff in the mix. Always more stuff in the mix,

A Page of Gratitude

Hello, My Loves *soft squishy heart*

Can I have a hug?

[a moment to soak it in]

Mmmm, thank you.

As I knew it would be, 2013 has been rockin my socks.

My very first thought of the year was that it was time to release my RV, and that evening the perfect new owner threw out his idea.

It took about 7 days of deep heavy processing, physically, emotionally, and the like. It was a lot, but it wasn't a house. Thank goodness :)

And now, I am RV free. It's just me + 3, a van, and cute little 5x5 storage unit (with yet more stuff to release). Wahoo!

It was as liberating to release the RV as it was to receive it.

I am so at peace. All the stress that was the RV in my life, now gone.

On the day that was to be my final day finishing the few tiny things left in it, I got a phone call from my best friend of almost 20 years' husband. She was 8 months and 1 day pregnant and the baby had stopped moving, so they went to the ER, and there was no heartbeat.

Baby Ella had passed.

It has been a very intense 5 days. Grief. Love. Togetherness. Community. Tear-shedding beauty. Release. Growth. Even peace.

It's quite a story that I will share with you when I have sorted through it a bit more and decided how to write it. Because... Well, there are kind of 2 stories.

The one I sometimes tell myself that breaks my heart, and the simultaneously running one where even when put to the test, I can't help but have faith that it is all part of a perfect plan, the one where we chose what we want to feel and how we want to experience every bit of it.

Both are very real and very present.

My friend is on a journey that I can't walk for her, but I am honored to walk with her, to be with her, to hold her, to cry with her, to release with her, to bear witness to her journey through my eyes.

It is my honor to hold a sacred space for her.

And I am blessed to be on quite an incredible journey myself right now. This experience, and where I am in in my life already, have untwisted my relationship with death. I was so afraid, oh-so very afraid, of death, and now I have peace.

The ways I, personally, have grown as a healer, over the past 5 days is exciting and humbling.

What I have released, and what I have witnessed have amazed and transformed me.

Thank you, Baby Ella ♥
A few days ago, on Facebook, I wrote

Death humbles me. Thank you, Death, for reminding me of beauty and blessings. Thank you, Life, for allowing me to be present for this family's grieving and healing ♥

...As happens in my life, often, as I opened this blank blog post canvas to connect with you, I checked with my incredible planner, and next on my list to share with you more in depth was my Page of Gratitude.

How perfectly synonymous with what is going on in our life right now.

And so I give to you...

May I walk you through?

I am grateful & thankful for...

♥ blessings & gifts ♥

stuff, not stuff

from people & the universe

(depicted as a purple gift box - with spirals all over it, of course)

 

zen, peace, flow, water

(depicted as 2 blue parallel wavy lines)

 

my family & friends

(depicted as a rich red heart, hugged by the words family and friends)

 

living in a constant state of newness,

a new opportunity to start fresh :)

(depicted as a spiral sun with bright reaching rays)

 

authenticity,

alignment,

groundedness,

pace

(depicted as a foot print)

 

the sacred journey ♥

(depicted as a big lose bright purple spiral that I journey into, or journey out of, depending on the experience)

 

living from my soul, my gut;

my gift to the world, shining!

(depicted as rays emanating from my hands that are outstretched in offering)

 

beauty,

art,

creativity,

inspiration

(depicted as several squiggly purply spirals, not unlike the curls of my hair)

 

input, blogs,

research, books,

conversations

(depicted as direct lines coming in from all directions in more than one layer)

 

my health!

my kids' health!

(depicted as a big ol' smile-a-happiness)

 

♥ our simple

cozy home ♥

(depicted as our cute little minivan outline)

 

my dreams,

possibilities,

opportunities

(depicted as energy lines bursting out into the universe)

 

kindness,

forgiveness,

love

(depicted as several teeny pink hearts floating in existence)

 

life,

growth

(depicted as a bloomin flower coming forth from rich green grass)

 

connection, oneness,

♥ Namaste ♥

(depicted as 2 hands together in solidarity and prayer)

 

roots & limbs,

sink & reach

(depicted as a hearty green spirally tree with rich purple spirally roots)

 



"Gratitude bestows reverence, allowing us to encounter everyday epiphanies, those transcendent moments of awe that change forever how we experience life and the world." - Sarah Breathnach

What moves you in gratitude?

Always sharing this space with you,

 

A Wild Sacred Circle

Hello, Darling :)

It is so delicious to be waking up with you this morning, and I can't wait to share with you what has been whispering to me recently. I really want to hear from you if this is something you want to come be a part of...

I don't know how long we have known each other.

Fourscore and 7 or 8 years ago, I had a page on MySpace where I played with HTML, gathered friends close, shouted out my radical soulidarity style activism, and shared the details of my growing interracial relationship and the pregnancy of my son. I was dubbed Radical Mama there, and am still dear friends with a few folks from those days :)

But after I had my son, I felt very drawn toward wanting to connect with other mamas very deeply about parenting.

What happened next transformed me into the mama and the woman you see me as today.

I joined a popular mothering site that was very mainstream, and I found a few alternative groups that really appealed to me. They helped me find words and spaces where I fit, like attachment parenting and crunchy mamas. With the words, the titles, the vocabulary, I was able to delve deeper into ways of being that resonated so deeply with me.

I wanted to be deeply involved with the many spaces that reflected me and helped me to grow through connecting with like mamas, but it was so hard. I wanted one space where I could gather diverse mamas with one common heart, and so I created my own niche.

I opened up a group and howled my metaphorical howl (the group description) to call my pack to me.

And they came.

And it was tear-sheddingly beautiful.

I had started a group called the Radical Mamas Group, but how it was co-created by every member, and the depths that we shared and loved, and the ways we stretched and grew deeper into our shared truths made us a tribe.

Before long, we were the Radical Mamas' Tribe.

Each of us were radical in our own ways - whether it was how sustainably we walked on the earth, how connectedly we parented our children, how woman-empoweredly we birthed them and climbed the mountains of our own journey and lived... We were all radical mamas aspiring to be even more radical, and we were a Tribe doing it ♥

It was the first time I felt the true deep connection of sisterhood. We were a giant group hug. Some of us needed support through trying times or circumstances, some needed information, some validation, some just connection with kindred mamas. Sometimes we came to be hugged, and sometimes we came to hug our sisters.

How I was stretched and grew completely revolutionized my life and transformed me as a parent and woman and a person.

This was the space where I first heard the words and callings toward unschooling, consensual living, unassisted birth, elimination communication, red tents, living completely off the grid, tribal living, and all the subtle pieces that seamlessly weaved themselves into my tapestry...

Each of us were both teachers and seekers, because of the vast topics we covered, like in a whole real life community.

Not only did I hear and learn about these things, but I had training wheels right there. Mama who were on various parts of their own journeys, who could hold my hand, love me, and guide me toward the resources that I could use to grow my own personal journey.

But this was so much more than learning information and growing as an individual. I wish words could capture and express the depths of the sisterhood, how we grew in ways of communication with each other, how we opened our hearts so wide and deep for each other in true and perfect trust and real love.

The way new members would come and read a few posts and get the vibe, the style of communication, the richness of our relationships, the way of the Tribe.

In the depths of our connection, we wanted to start a real life community, buy some land, start our own commune. We wanted more. It is why I still burn for a tribe, I still grow in ways that bring me closer to starting my own intentional community, I bring people in oh-so close and interact with them as if we were living a love letter of sisterhood.

It is why I can't wait to travel and meet these mamas who are my Tribe ♥


I grew so much.

I grew rapidly for the 3 years while in the Tribe, and I have grown through the process of leaving it and the 3 years of healing that has happened since. So many things I have learned about how I would do things differently. So many times I tried to recreate the Tribe without success.

And then it clicked.. I wasn't supposed to recreate the Tribe. I was supposed to create something new.

I just haven't been ready.

And then... it has started to creep up on me. A whisper here or there, an ache for sharing something with a deeply involved group, a calling toward being a purple shaman in close virtual quarters, a longing for a mentor in the capacity that a Tribe provides.

I woke up this morning with an idea for a forum: Loving Ourselves, where we could share our journeys, our challenges, our ways of being, our cup filling, our... anything. I would love to take that journey with you.

Is this a journey you are interested in taking with me and folks like us?

I haven't worked out the details completely, but it would probably be about $10 a month and be for wild sacred men and women, with private spaces for both.

I was made for creating these spaces. I draw the most incredible people to me. I would love to gather them all together in a space where we can commune, grow, talk, listen, feel, be.

Are you up for it?

Please let me know. If the comments section is acting funny, feel free to email me or contact me on facebook, k?

I love you. I love you. I love yooooooouuuuuu,