Hello, my love *this is where I would enter a script-heart if my blog didn't think it was a messed up HTML code*
Hello.
Hello.
Oh, how I have missed connecting with you.
I have so much deliciousness to share.
Life is bountiful and simple and sacred and full of space for dreaming and fantasy planning and real planning and allowing things to unfold as I take one perfect aligned and delicious step at a time.
I have been thick in creation-mode, even though the laptop gods saw fit to make me take a break from mine for almost a month (I am on a brand new one right now that I ADORE). I have been thinking in imagination flow about how I want to wrap up my Whole Family Learning e-package (formerly known as Growing a Whole Child), and how I am going to completely revamp my A Powerful Birth e-package (formerly known as just Powerful Birth - I like the shift an A brings).
I have been even thicker in information inputting, reflecting, and soaking the good stuff in. I just knew Pixie Campbell would have some medicine for my soul, so I started reading her blog from the beginning (I am about 3 years in now), sorting through it with a fine toothed comb, journal ready, pen in hand. Oh, such delicious healing. And arrows to my new steps in life.
Visions flowing out of me. I used to dream my visions for the future, and now they flow out of me while I am awake. I know I am channeling. They way it flows out astounds me, and I LOVE what I see and the internal healing that ensues, knowing the limitless possibilities of time means that I can bathe in the future "fixes" by feeling the healing today. I am feeling more connected to my destined role of medicine woman, shaman, inner journey woman, fearless shadow visitor, storyteller, story re-interpreter.
And then there is the life experiencing. Feeling so very aligned, releasing fear and control, opening up to humble blessings, and enjoying the results. So clear. So delicious. So chocked full of learning.
We have brought life down to the most basic for the winter, so I can focus my energy on the deep healing and planting I do during this time.
Creating wide open spaces for growing new things. Products galore. Sacred sisterhood circles. Financial reprieve to set us up for a successful new year.
I was feeling scared, and I was feeling alone, and I was feeling drawn away from the nomad life. And then I had a huge epiphany. The epiphany was that this last year has been so stressful because I am used to jumping into things and being an instant master, but I am not used to being such an awkward learner, and this has been some serious learning.
Once I realized that the sky opened up and the universe shone down upon me. There wasn't something wrong with me. I was just learning. I was a novice. It wasn't coming naturally to me. It was completely new and different.
And this wasn't the first time. There NEVER was something wrong with me. I was always just on a learning journey.
And suddenly I realized that the super hard, overwhelming, "I can't take this" was a transition, like in birth (when the mama suddenly thinks it is too much and she can't take it and she can't do it), on the precipus of something epic and huge and incredible. If I had stopped when it got hard, if I had backed away, I would have missed the ginormous lesson, the opportunity to rebirth my life with this new understanding and sense of capability and limitless possibility, or to be reborn through my experience.
And now life. Ah, life. Yummy yummy life.
Living the simple. Experiencing the abundant. Loving the BEing.
Vanpacking. We are up to it again. Must be something about this time of year.
We had talk of selling the RV. On Facebook, I wrote, "I don't know where we are headed, but i know this: I create miracles, and we manifest incredible life experiences. I take leaps of faith, and nets appear. So, I'm going with that :)"
I want to live a life that grows from inspiration and brilliant zinging bliss, and I was feeling so stuck with the RV and so out of alignment. So, as we prepped it to put into storage yesterday, and it was empty and clean, I realized how much I really really love it. It is boondocking that leaves me feeling ick, not our beloved Gypsy Goddess. I want to keep her. So, we are going to put her in storage, to keep her safe from the registration-enforcers, and grow my income, so we can get her all legit, find a cozy spot to call home, and enjoy life.
I look forward to having a nice monthly spot that we love that is close to Kass' fabulous school in the incredible city we are so blessed to call home right now. And I look forward to tempering that with some deep serious travelling in the summer. My gypsy blood is itching.
I can't give up this life yet - I haven't even travelled yet!!! LOL
So, we are looking to find a delicious combination of local living and travel adventures. I want to steal away whenever Kass has a break from school. (Thankfully, she only goes 2 days a week, so a "week" off school, is actually closer to 2 weeks.)
The missing link between here and there is just money. Well, maybe a bit of sisterhood, too.
So, I have been prepping my soil, especially most recently, and I am gearing up to ease into this new journey.
Which reminds me of another piece of my patchwork path of learning. Previously, I lept into new experiences. I would make a mad dash for the finish line. I tried to skip the awkward learning phases.
I had a vision recently, where I envisioned myself in a new foreign city. My first inclination is to rush through, to fly past the discomfort in my gut. And I realized that once my babies are old enough to be okay without me for a week, I need to take a retreat to India alone. I need to practice moving slowly in a new place, by myself, so I can really focus on my internals during the process. And I want to stay in an ashram, so I can sink into some soul work during the journey.
Well, during this money and sisterhood learning, I am going to sink deeply and slowly. I have learned so much about leaning into learning, and I have been dabbling in quickness. But quick-fix is not going to work at this next step. Once I have my grounding, my footing I hope I can start leaping and flying and such. But for now, the naturally-embedded detours and early learning should be sufficient challenge :)
Well, my love. I am sure there is a whole heckavalot more I could share, but for now, this feels full.
I love you.
Thank you for being patient with my blog & biz learning, and thank you for being with me as I fumble, burst, laugh, cry, love, connect, give.
So blessed to have you by my side ♥
Will you gift me with a precious jewel from your treasure trove of money and sisterhood (comment below)? I would love to sit with it and soak in its medicine as I take in these next few steps of my journey.
I love you.
Have I told you recently how much I love you?
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| This reminds me of us. Maybe a whole orchard of these. Found it here. |
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