A Page of Gratitude

Hello, My Loves *soft squishy heart*

Can I have a hug?

[a moment to soak it in]

Mmmm, thank you.

As I knew it would be, 2013 has been rockin my socks.

My very first thought of the year was that it was time to release my RV, and that evening the perfect new owner threw out his idea.

It took about 7 days of deep heavy processing, physically, emotionally, and the like. It was a lot, but it wasn't a house. Thank goodness :)

And now, I am RV free. It's just me + 3, a van, and cute little 5x5 storage unit (with yet more stuff to release). Wahoo!

It was as liberating to release the RV as it was to receive it.

I am so at peace. All the stress that was the RV in my life, now gone.

On the day that was to be my final day finishing the few tiny things left in it, I got a phone call from my best friend of almost 20 years' husband. She was 8 months and 1 day pregnant and the baby had stopped moving, so they went to the ER, and there was no heartbeat.

Baby Ella had passed.

It has been a very intense 5 days. Grief. Love. Togetherness. Community. Tear-shedding beauty. Release. Growth. Even peace.

It's quite a story that I will share with you when I have sorted through it a bit more and decided how to write it. Because... Well, there are kind of 2 stories.

The one I sometimes tell myself that breaks my heart, and the simultaneously running one where even when put to the test, I can't help but have faith that it is all part of a perfect plan, the one where we chose what we want to feel and how we want to experience every bit of it.

Both are very real and very present.

My friend is on a journey that I can't walk for her, but I am honored to walk with her, to be with her, to hold her, to cry with her, to release with her, to bear witness to her journey through my eyes.

It is my honor to hold a sacred space for her.

And I am blessed to be on quite an incredible journey myself right now. This experience, and where I am in in my life already, have untwisted my relationship with death. I was so afraid, oh-so very afraid, of death, and now I have peace.

The ways I, personally, have grown as a healer, over the past 5 days is exciting and humbling.

What I have released, and what I have witnessed have amazed and transformed me.

Thank you, Baby Ella ♥
A few days ago, on Facebook, I wrote

Death humbles me. Thank you, Death, for reminding me of beauty and blessings. Thank you, Life, for allowing me to be present for this family's grieving and healing ♥

...As happens in my life, often, as I opened this blank blog post canvas to connect with you, I checked with my incredible planner, and next on my list to share with you more in depth was my Page of Gratitude.

How perfectly synonymous with what is going on in our life right now.

And so I give to you...

May I walk you through?

I am grateful & thankful for...

♥ blessings & gifts ♥

stuff, not stuff

from people & the universe

(depicted as a purple gift box - with spirals all over it, of course)

 

zen, peace, flow, water

(depicted as 2 blue parallel wavy lines)

 

my family & friends

(depicted as a rich red heart, hugged by the words family and friends)

 

living in a constant state of newness,

a new opportunity to start fresh :)

(depicted as a spiral sun with bright reaching rays)

 

authenticity,

alignment,

groundedness,

pace

(depicted as a foot print)

 

the sacred journey ♥

(depicted as a big lose bright purple spiral that I journey into, or journey out of, depending on the experience)

 

living from my soul, my gut;

my gift to the world, shining!

(depicted as rays emanating from my hands that are outstretched in offering)

 

beauty,

art,

creativity,

inspiration

(depicted as several squiggly purply spirals, not unlike the curls of my hair)

 

input, blogs,

research, books,

conversations

(depicted as direct lines coming in from all directions in more than one layer)

 

my health!

my kids' health!

(depicted as a big ol' smile-a-happiness)

 

♥ our simple

cozy home ♥

(depicted as our cute little minivan outline)

 

my dreams,

possibilities,

opportunities

(depicted as energy lines bursting out into the universe)

 

kindness,

forgiveness,

love

(depicted as several teeny pink hearts floating in existence)

 

life,

growth

(depicted as a bloomin flower coming forth from rich green grass)

 

connection, oneness,

♥ Namaste ♥

(depicted as 2 hands together in solidarity and prayer)

 

roots & limbs,

sink & reach

(depicted as a hearty green spirally tree with rich purple spirally roots)

 



"Gratitude bestows reverence, allowing us to encounter everyday epiphanies, those transcendent moments of awe that change forever how we experience life and the world." - Sarah Breathnach

What moves you in gratitude?

Always sharing this space with you,