A New Identity -- Church-goer?

I was the kid who never questioned why my parents divorced, or ever wondered why they couldn't be together. I knew. I couldn't imagine my parents together -- they were so different. For example, my mom was a tree-hugging dirt worshipper (she practiced Witchcraft), and my dad was a Pentecostal preacher. My mom didn't tell me, for many years, about her faith (for fears concerning custody with my dad). I just knew that she kindly declined going to church, even though my stepmom told me how important it was to get her to go. Witchcraft and other Pagan beliefs are so different in that aspect -- don't find too many Pagan missionaries :)) Well, my mom finally told me everything she had been holding on to the year I came home from my dad's talking about how evil gay people were, that they were going to hell -- repeating what I'd heard in a recent sermon by my dad. My mom and I had a long good talk then :) It changed my life. But it didn't change my dad's stance on my attending church -- he made me and my siblings go every Sunday, regardless. Regardless of the fact that he knew it was not MY church -- my faith was different. I built up a very strong resentment of going to church -- so much so that I started not even wanting to visit my dad, or planning my visits to avoid Sundays. At one point I remember thinking to myself, "If I don't want to be here, what does he REALLY think I am going to get out of this?"

It wasn't until recently that I realized just how much my identity is based upon not being a church-goer. Although I don't identify as the anti-Christian I once did, I have to admit that I have grown fond of the quiet Sunday mornings in the city. I expect stores and restaurants to be less crowded, and I don't own any clothes that could pass as "Sunday best". I know my daughter's friends won't be knocking on my door or ringing my doorbell until well after noon on Sundays. The only regular thing we do (so far) on a certain day of the week is our radical unschooling parkday, which, I assure you, looks nothing like a church sermon LOL It goes even deeper, but I can't find the words to explain how far-removed I am from the ritual of Sunday church.

So, what, you may ask, could draw me out of this long-held, very comfortable place? Unitarian Universalist. My family has been drawn toward wanting some spiritual growth in life, as well as community. I first heard of UU from a dear atheist liberal friend, who could not say enough wonderful things about it. I had heard there was one about 30 minutes or so from us, and I kept wanting to check it out, but I knew I couldn't commit to such a long drive every week. Then a friend told me there was one in my neighboring city. Well, after my Goddess awakening, I looked into it. I devoured their website. Things like this:

Unitarian Universalism is a caring, open-minded religion that encourages you to seek your own spiritual path. Our Faith draws on many religious traditions, welcoming people with different beliefs. We are united by shared values, not by creed or dogma. Our congregations are places where people gather to nurture their spirits and put their faith into action by helping to make our communities—and the world—a better place.


Unitarian Universalists (UUs) are committed not only to spiritual growth and transformation but also to involvement in the world. Social justice, sustainable living, ethical treatment of animals are just a few of things we work toward.

You can see how this fits into my values... So, after devouring the website, I knew that this place held my ideals, and I looked forward to going to the church to see how it felt in person. Honestly, I was afraid that I wouldn't be able to stomach the "church"-likeness of it. But the rituals felt so earth- and natural-centered. And they took long pauses in between the "God-free" wisdom the minister (a woman with at least one tattoo) shared about the cycle of life (entitled "New Beginnings", and concluding a 2-part piece -- the 1st half entitled "Letting Go"). And people said "Namaste" and "Blessed be". They sat with their hands in the OM position to soak in the words and the silence. These were my people! I felt so at home, tears, literally, filled my eyes. Home? Church? Yes... I saw people who looked like me and knew I wasn't different, that my kids weren't going to be different for their non-Christian, but spiritual beliefs. My oldest could sort out her own path of believing in a God bt not quite feeling like Christianity was the right fit for her.

I want to conclude with a song that we sang, an affirmation that I want to revisit very often (maybe every day?)...

May I be filled with loving kindness

May I be well

May I be filled with loving kindness

May I be well

May I be peaceful and at ease

May I be whole

May you be filled with loving kindness

May you be well

May you be filled with loving kindness

May you be well

May you be peaceful and at ease

May you be whole

May we be filled with loving kindness

May we be well

May we be filled with loving kindness

May we be well

May we be peaceful and at ease

May we be whole

Namaste, Dear Reader.